It’s Simple—People Help
Today I had another lesson in giving up ways I block my effectiveness and pleasure.
I am planning to conduct a workshop in May. I needed to firm up some basics today, but couldn’t get any clear direction.
I reverted back to one of my old behaviors, related to perfectionism, which is to pressure myself to solve the problem and then shut down when I can’t figure things out. All of this is within the context of the mistaken belief that there is something wrong with me if I can’t figure things out by myself. It’s that guy thing—too much shame to admit I need directions/help.
So I went through my typical pattern of self-criticism, shame, and repetitive unproductive thinking until I was exhausted. I was stuck in a rut.
I finally caught on after lunch and called time out. I took a nap, which helped somewhat. I drank some tea (caffeine!) and did a little stretching. Then I spoke with a colleague about my plans. I was surprised that we had such a productive and enjoyable planning session. His input and friendship helped greatly.
Now it seems so simple—all I had to do was reach out. Two heads are better than one. I should know this, right?